one last post before I hit the sack...

I know this blog is titled "our family," but it tends to just be about two little girls... next summer it'll involve the older 3 more since they'll be around more. my next posts will be about Maya's and Bryson's birthdays. And this one is for me (especially since I promised my babycenter weight loss group I'd blog about my journey!).

I'm down to about 219 lbs. That's going off Monday mornings before I eat, in my underwear weighings. In two days we'll see what the scale says. Tomorrow I start a cleanse of sorts with usana reset shakes (well, the nutrimeal part of it) and lots of fruits and veggies. Yes, it will certainly cleanse my innards! And the shakes are supposed to be formulated to help "reset" my metabolism and help ward off cravings. My friend, Brittney, does a modified version of their reset diet- what I'm going to do, and it's worked for her, so I'm going to give it a try! And if I can survive on that for five days, it'll prove to me I have the willpower to do better with my eating! I have been doing a lot better, I think (though not as well the last couple weeks as I did the first one!). I'm trying to provide better snacks for Maya, as well, and an awesome nutrition lesson (Louise rocks!) at our last mid-week activity for Relief Society helped me a ton in putting things into perspective! (Plus talking with all the "crunchy" moms around the Portland area makes me feel like I eat and feed my family total crap!) I watched King Corn on netflix and as much as I'd like to watch food, inc, and stuff like that, I think I'm going to avoid it because it'll affect me too much at this point and make me feel awful about what I'm eating and feeding my family (minus Addison, she's getting superfood from me, though those zillion jars of Gerber in her closet are waiting to fill her belly with all sorts of processed goodness). I know that's their point, and with my mindset right now, it would work. But like Jared and I talked about tonight, we're alive. So we eat processed foods. Big deal. We're alive and well, a few (times ten in my case) pounds heavier than we'd like to be, but things could be worse.

So... before I get too longwinded (I just deleted what began as a run-on sentence because it kept running and I need to sleep!), I'll just say: I'm trying. I could be doing better, and I hope to. Another step begins tomorrow with this cleanse, and I will step on the scale again Monday, get my butt to the gym, and keep going on my journey to fit into my size 16's (and even lower than that will be awesome!).